Blood, bruises and broken spirits are something to be expected with any major athlete, but it is also too familiar for any serious ballet dancer. The dancer must deal with the demands of perfect poise and structure along with constant scrutiny of not being able to show anguish while performing.
Lauren Saldubehere not only deals with this struggle, she embraces it.
At age 5, Saldubehere began taking dance classes at The Civic Dance Center in Bakersfield, where she now teaches. In 1992, she got her first role as a Bon-Bon girl in the “Nutcracker,” a ballet performed every winter by the dance center. Saldubehere has been part of it every year since her debut.
It was there that Saldubehere developed a passion for dancing that would lead her across the country.
In 1998, Saldubehere started eighth grade with a serious view on dance. She began studying intensively, and in 2001 traveled to Pennsylvania to study at The Pittsburgh Ballet.
“It’s like athletic training,” Saldubehere said. “You learn how to get into the company and get to meet all different types of people from around the country who all share a love for dance and ballet.”
Pittsburgh led to other dance programs in cities such as Philadelphia and New York, each one lasting a number of weeks with strict work led by professionals in the business. At the end of the programs, the students’ work was displayed in a performance, which put their talents to the test.
“You can’t show emotion, pain or agony while you’re performing,” Saldubehere said. “You’re playing a character, and you have to be serious. It’s an extremely hard sport.”
Pain was something Saldubehere was all too familiar with as she spoke about losing a toenail during a rehearsal, but it was just a fragment of the agony she was about to face.
After auditioning for universities and Julliard, placing in the top five in California alone, Saldubehere began attending Bakersfield College where, about two months ago, she faced a nightmare every dancer dreads. As she woke up for school one morning, she stepped on a shoe getting out of bed, lost her balance and tore a ligament in her left ankle. She recalled hearing a ripping sound as she fell to the floor, followed by extreme pain and the thought that she may never dance again.
“The doctors said it would have been better if I had just broken my ankle,” Saldubehere said. “There were so many bad thoughts going through my head that this would affect what I planned on doing for the rest of my life.”
Saldubehere was wheelchair bound for a week but determined to not let this end her dream after she had worked so hard to get this far. With the help of physical therapy two hours a day, three days a week, she started to slowly regain her balance. Swimming and the Pilates exercise program played a helpful part in getting her back in good condition. After going from a wheelchair to crutches, she was able to get back on stage and back to work.
“What kept me going was my love of performing,” she said. “Once you have it in you, it doesn’t go away.”
She is now working on “The Nutcracker,” which is scheduled to start showing in December at The Bakersfield Convention Center with music by The Bakersfield Symphony Orchestra. Saldubehere, glad to be teaching ballet again and getting ready to dance in the upcoming performance, plans to attend UC Irvine to continue her degree in dance. She will then move to New York to dance with a ballet company, and then return to the West Coast to teach dance.She hopes to open her own studio.
“It’s a cultural experience that everyone should do,” Saldubehere said. “You’ll have your ups and downs, but if you love it then do it. If you want it bad enough, you have to make it happen and always look at the bigger picture.”