Soon the Mr. America contest, aka the presidential election, will be upon us. The two hall monitors, Kerry and Bush, are in a close race for a student body seat. When it’s your turn to cast your ballot, remember there is a dark horse straight from the audio/visual department. He wants to clean up the playground and provide more opportunities for the average Joe to do his own homework.
Don’t worry about taking votes from the other candidates. They’ll have plenty of support from the administrators to the janitorial staff by promising an end to the bullying problem, when in reality they’ll just send their kids to summer camp.
So read between the lines, decide for yourself: Do you want a government that treats you like independent adults, or do you want a government that does the thinking for you and treats you like schoolchildren.
So let’s put an end to empty threats, let’s voice our opinions and vote for the one who counts and make this a safe and happy campus. Perhaps it’s best explained in poem form:
Did you vote for Bush because Gore was a bore? Well this time the election needn’t be such a chore.
Remember the alternative, that corporate raider, who goes by the name quite simply Ralph Nader.
The man who’s pro choice, so let’s hear your voice, his stance on minimum wage, we’ll all drive a Rolls Royce.
I know you can do it, I know that you can, it’s better than eating green eggs and ham.
Taking votes away from Kerry may seem kind of scary, George W. again, this burden we’ll carry.
A vote for Nader is worth two for the Bush, but if we want change, then Nader we must push.
Get on your feet; get off of your can, medicinal marijuana, Nader’s your man.
If your name is Rick and you want to marry Nick, Then it’s candidate Ralph that you’ll want to pick.
Remember the alternative, that corporate raider, who goes by the name, quite simply Ralph Nader.