Dr. Laura Schlessinger holds the key to a happy marriage in her latest book ‘The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands’: Your man should be the center of your universe.
All this time I thought men could feed and care for themselves, but the doctor helped me to see how wrong I was. The book helped me realize that men are “simple creatures” who need to be coddled.
Schlessinger’s book is filled with little gems like, “The man should be the major breadwinner in the family. Every man needs a battle or war to win to prove to himself that he is strong and capable of conquering any and all dragons that life throws his way.” Another tip is, “A man needs to know his wife is sexually satisfied by him.”
For Schlessinger, it is a woman’s obligation to let “her man” be the leader and provider. If you have a hot meal ready when he gets home and give him some good lovin’ when he wants it, you, too, can have marital bliss. Schlessinger repeatedly blames any problems that come up in a marriage on the woman’s self-centered, nagging insensitive demands on her neglected husband.
The only exception is a violation of the 3 A’s: Addiction, abuse and affairs.
Schlessinger opens her first chapter with a quote from a man named Edgar. “Prosperity has allowed women to be so independent and thus so selfish,” he said. As far as she is concerned, feminism is “destructive nonsense.”
Occasionally, Schlessinger takes an evenhanded approach to marital problems, but she soon backslides into blaming feminism for problem marriages, saying that, “it’s a result of the women’s movement, with its condemnation of just about everything male as evil, stupid and oppressive.”
According to the book, Suzanne, a 43-year-old real estate agent, called Schlessinger about her husband of more than 20 years. His ultimatum: she quits her job, or he wants a divorce. Schlessinger responds, “After all these years, and all your nonsense, he still loves you and wants to be your man. At your age of 43, see how many other guys are going to say that to you, sweetheart.” The doctor expresses her confusion over Suzanne’s anger over the ultimatum. “I can’t understand why a wife would see her husband wanting to spend more time with her as a bad thing.”
Sex is a frequent topic in the book. One woman called Schlessinger’s radio talk show asking if she was obligated to have sex when she didn’t want to. Her reply is, “Most of the time, yes,” going on to say that “If women would show more compassion for a man’s physical needs, they would find themselves happier.”
After all, Schlessinger adds, “Orgasms will put a smile on your face … and release a lot of tension.”
Understand where she is coming from: She’s a conservative practitioner of Orthodox Judaism who is all for traditional gender roles. For this reviewer, the book was good for a laugh, but I can’t recommend it to anyone.
The book is really just a collection of letters and transcripts from Schlessinger’s radio show. Don’t spend your money. You can get the same information by watching a rerun of “Leave it to Beaver.”