I was reading about fetishes and sexual addictions on the Internet and I came across a number of extremely weird preferences I would have never imagined would get people off, like diaper fetishes, sock fetishes, fecal fetishes, emetophilia (vomiting), and believe it or not, choking turns people on.
How do we distinguish between what’s sexy, and what’s simply sick?
Some of these fetishes are clearly unhealthy, unsanitary, very disturbing, and can lead to sex addiction.
According to DiscoveryHealth, “Fetishism is a fixation on an inanimate object or body part that is not primarily sexual in nature, and the compulsive need for its use in order to obtain sexual gratification.” I believe these fetishes derive from one’s past experiences.
I watched an episode of Dr. Phil where a married man admitted to becoming a sex addict after being given a porn magazine at the age of 4 or 5 years old. Since the porn magazine experience early in his childhood, the man said the images stuck in his head.
Since then, he’s been obsessed with surfing the Internet daily to masturbate to porn, engaging in cybersex via webcam with other women. He even had sex with a prostitute and his wife in the same day. The man was desperate to overcome his addiction as it was posing a major threat to his marriage. I’m convinced that he preferred masturbating to mere images rather than engage in healthy sexual activity with his wife. Wikipedia.org claims, “Studies in the U.S. have shown that about three quarters of all men find the idea of bondage to be erotic; many women do as well.”
Whether people admit to it or not, everyone has a “thing,” a sexual fantasy, something weird or kinky that excites the libido, but where we draw the line is the question. A man turned on by a tape-gagged, bound, helpless woman may be common just as a woman may find herself aroused by the idea of being the victim, kidnapped, and taken advantage of against her will, but is this scenario or role play an absolute requirement in order to achieve orgasm?
My concern is that the Internet is making unhealthy sexual activities too available to both youth and adults causing emotional and psychological instability. I mean there are people literally hooked on cybersex who have become isolated, completely alone, and severely depressed.
Many who prefer these unorthodox ways of sexual gratification aren’t capable of maintaining healthy relationships. These fixations take over their lives, and according to Cybersexualaddiction.com, “Unlike healthy sex that is integrated into relationships, sexual addicts use sex as a means to cope, to handle boredom, anxiety, and other powerful feelings or as a way to feel important, wanted or powerful.”
For example, those who are fixated on bondage (BDSM) have either been or felt like they were controlled at one point and now have the powerful urge to act the part of the controller during sex. Obviously each individual has his or her own sexual preferences, and that’s exactly what they are: preferences. A little role-play or acting out fantasies every now and then to escape the mundane reality and experience new and exciting sexual adventures is perfectly fine.
However, when it’s as life threatening as suffocation, grossly vile as vomiting, or psychologically threatening to the point of addiction, this is where I draw the line between what’s sexy and what’s absolutely sick.